Do you have a friend you can tell anything to? I mean anything. The worst, most despicable, selfish, ugly parts of you, the ones you thought you’d have to take to the grave before you met her. I am so blessed to have a friend like that, a woman I can lay it all out in front of. And she listens. Sometimes she gasps. But she never drops my heart.
I am feeling particularly grateful for her this week. Sometimes she texts me at just the moment when I feel like I might fall apart, and I wonder how she knew I needed her at that precise moment. Sometimes I walk into her office and the expression on my face makes her get up and shut the door behind me. Sometimes, if I start crying minutes before I have to be somebody, she’ll turn into an emotional aerobics instructor, “OK, and lift, lift it up, and breathe, breathe it out. Again. Lift, lift it up, way up here, and then breathe, good girl.” I laugh through my tears. And she never lets me leave her office before my mascara is fixed.
I don’t know if the love I give her is half as good as the love she gives me. I am not a very good friend. I have a history of putting work and family and every other thing first and friends last. But this friend of mine? She is me, only petite, and her face is the one my heavy heart longs to see some days.
Wonder if she’s in her office now?